A picture in the form of a memory. (also from a recent e-mail)

My dad's father couldn't talk for the last 5 or 6 years of his life. I have one particularly fond memory of him during that time.
He wasn't a believer, and his life wasn't marked by joy. One time we came to visit him. When he saw our son, he lite up. It was obvious how my grandfather wanted to be with my son and enjoy him. Unfortunately, it was short-lived with our squirrely toddler. The only picture I have of it is in my memory.

God's specific will (from a recent e-mail)

Question, how do you know that God really wants you to go to Africa? Could this be a test of your faith?
I'm certain this is a test of our faith. God is deeply interested in our faith.
We know that God wants us to go to Mali because He has opened doors in that directions, and, more importantly, it is the greatest desire of our hearts. The Bible is rife with the command to go, make Him known, proclaim His works, and glorify His Son. Heidi's and my hearts resonate with going. It's one of those things that is so ingrained in us that it's a little hard to understand how everyone else isn't completely leveled with the wonderful and adventurous task set before us. The ways that Heidi's and my desires match is a confirmation for us. At this point, I would go to my grave trying to reach Mali. Admittedly our inability is frustrating. We don't understand exactly why God is leading us down the scenic route, but we're confident it is for His greatest glory, just like a missionary we know that took him nearly 20 years to get where God was leading him. That struggle now defines his as separate from this world, unique in his pursuit of God (or more accurately, God's pursuit of him).

Pumpkin Carving Timelapse

Beautiful Boy

Zechariah Job brings us so much joy! Every day and every night I snuggle him, talk to him, make him laugh, and pray for him. He is just full to the brim with smiles and curiosity.

Some MTI pictures to help you understand.

So here are some photos to illustrate some of the things Heidi talked about in our newsletter. The picture below is another way of looking at the process of bridging two cultures. It shows a missionary being transplanted. 

I tried to transplant a pine tree in our yard. It died, but I learned some things about being transplanted. Roots go deep, and a lot of them get cut. A plant begins to die immediately after it is uprooted. It takes copious and consistent watering for a long time for a plant to re-root itself in a new location. 

This happens in some way ever time a missionary leaves. 

You can imagine how much this helped our children understand what they are headed for. We were able to have some good discussions with them at MTI.

Drew dives right in to new situations. His personality is shy, but he is emotionally eager to be a part of other peoples lives. The hurt of leaving and transitioning catches him by surprise. 

Joe sees it coming a little more, and he's a little less likely to attach himself emotionally. He says he knows the places we're going "aren't home."

Below is the bridge illustration. It starts with those sturdy, firm chairs. Next comes rocking office chairs.

After the shaky office chairs came exercise balls held together with Saran Wrap. This guy (Isaac Barnes) actually made it all the way across (He's an MK). 

After Isaac they had 4 people cross together, and they were all linked together with climbing gear to represent family bonds. No one was on the same stage of the bridge at the same time, and they were able to help each other make it across without falling off. They told us not to expect everybody to be experiencing the same thing during transition, but to help each other at each stage.  

$13 Away From Our Goal!!!

Okay... sorry, that could be a misleading and coercive title, but Heidi and I are very excited by the fact that if each person on our mailing list (minus the people that already give) committed to give $13 a month... we'd be completely supported for full-time ministry in Mali, West Africa!!
Heidi and I support several missionaries to the tune of $10 a month. It felt insignificant at first, but we knew what a blessing it is to have someone commit to help you accomplish what God has called you to, and honestly, it has kept us connected to those missionaries over the years and over the miles.
So we're praying that you won't be afraid to be the little guy. POWER TO THE PEOPLE. CLICK HERE to make a commitment to us on-line.
If you don't get our snail mail, send us your address, and we'll add you to our super cool mailing list where you'll receive the coolest quarterly up-dates ever.

Mission Training International

While we were at MTI in Palmer Lake, CO for five weeks this summer we received fantastic training that we're so eager to use when we move over seas. In fact, the things they taught us have already helped in out ministry and communications here in the States. The language learning tools haven't helped much yet, but we're so ready to buckle down and learn a new language.
CLICK HERE for a link to a short video I did for MTI. The people that work there have to raise support too, so I was more than happy to use my video camera to help communicate what they do.

Time to catch up!

My best blog reader, Christine, sent me this forward, and I figured it's a quick way to catch people up since I haven't posted in a while.
 
 1.         What is your occupation right now?
 
I'm a support-raising missionary. We expect God to provide for all our needs, like He promised (Luke 12  27"Consider how the lilies grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 28If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will he clothe you, O you of little faith!)
So I see the biggest part of my job right now to be encouraging the American church to live like Christ called them to live.
 
 2.         What color are your socks right now? 
            bare feet

 
 3.         What are you listening to right now?
  A John Piper sermon about what the Bible says about husbands... It's called Lionhearted and Lamblike 


 4.      What was the last thing that you ate?
A bowl of Honey Bunches of Oats (Honey Roasted)


 
 5.       Can you drive a stick shift?
Like Speedracer...


 
 6.      Last person you spoke to on the phone?
  My dad, telling him I was on the way home from vacation with my boys.


 
 7.      Do you like the person who sent this to you?
Despite the fact that this question makes me feel like I'm in Jr. High, I do like the person who sent this to me. Christine lives like I want to live. She is a phenomenal example of a wife and mother the scripture honors. Plus, she is definitely the most likely person to comment on my blog.
 

8.      How old are you today?
  31
 
 
 9.      What is your favorite sport to watch on TV? 
  American Gladiator (at least back in the day) and the sports section of America's Funniest Home Videos     

 
 10.     What is your favorite drink?
  A big fat glass of milk

 
 11.    Have you ever bleached your hair?
Thanks to my girlfriend (now wife) I unwittingly put henna in my hair. The results made me look like a runway beacon.

 
 12.    Favorite food?
I've been waiting for someone to ask me this question for a while because I always forget to say communion. I love communion. I really savor it on every level. I can't get enough of it!!!
 

 13.    What is the last movie you watched?
  Night at the Museum

  
 14.    Favorite day of the year?
I've gotta say Christmas. I've always loved Christmas.
 
 15.    How do you vent anger?
Worst case scenario: yell at people I love or hide
Best case scenario: pray or go for a run
 
 16.    What was your favorite toy as a child?
I guess I'd have to say I was a Legos guy. I took some time to make a little wooden model airplane with my boys the other day. That was pretty great.  
 
 17.    What is your favorite season?
  Spring (though winter and fall are close behind) I love to see things grow, and (because we don't get much) I love rainy days.
 
 18.    Cherries or Blueberries?
ehh... I guess Cherries. Joe has been saying he wants some cherries.

 19.    Do you want your friends to e-mail you back?
  Getting a good e-mail can be the highlight of my day.
 
22.     Living arrangements?
There is a house and a studio at my parents place. The six of us live with my grandma in the main house, and my mom and dad live in the studio.
 
 23.    When was the last time you cried?
I got a little teary-eyed on the communion question, but I'm having a little trouble remembering the last time I really cried. I almost always cry during worship at our church. So I don't know if that really counts.

 24.    What is on the floor of your closet?
A pair of rollerblades, camera equipment, mailing boxes, about 1/3 of my clothes, shoes, and our DVDs... big closet.
 
 25.     Who is the friend you have had the longest that you  are sending to?
  I guess this doesn't really apply, but it's good timing because I was just looking at pictures from our wedding, and there was Cindy (Smedley) Garcia. I was thinking how wonderful it was that she flew out to Michigan for my wedding. She is my longest friend, and she's been a great one.
 
 26.    What did you do last night?
  I got home from a long vacation just with my boys. So Heidi and I spent most of the night getting reacquainted.
 
 27.    What are you most afraid of? 
Someone got bent out of shape the last time I answered this way, but basically, the worst thing I can imagine is to have one of my kids not fall in love with God.
 
 28.    Plain, cheese, or spicy hamburger
Definitely not plain, I like lots of stuff on my burger.
 
 29.    Favorite dog breed?
Australian Shepherd, they have been the best dogs in our family history.
 
 30.    Favorite day of the week?
Today
 
 31.    How many states have you lived in?
  4 states, 3 countries
 
 32.    Diamonds or pearls?
  Now I feel gay for answering this survey without reading all they way through it.
 
 33.    What is your favorite flower?
  I actually have a favorite flower, Ranunculi.

They are my family's business on my dad's side of the family.

My grandfather was instrumental in changing ranunculi from this...


to this.

Declare His Glory Among the Nations!

This is the kind of preaching I long for. It's fifty minutes long, but I really urge you, Tivo ER and take the time to listen to this. Get someone to sit down and listen with you. Pray before you start, and listen and be encouraged!

Click Here to listen to the audio.

You can also click on the title of this post to read or watch the same sermon, but I like the audio best because they read the scripture to you first. 

The way John Piper communicate... the urgency in his voice... that's how Heidi and I feel. We're so hungry for a healthy, obedient church... willing to lay down it's life and the lives of others for the honor of God's name, for the praise of God's name. 

Anniversary #9

Yesterday was Heidi's and my 9 year anniversary.
I have to admit. I was worried. I am almost every year. I've never had much to offer her. At least that's how I feel. We have been penniless nearly all of our married lives.
I remember back when we were dating. We didn't have much money. We were in school full-time. But we would go on long walks together. We window shopped a ton. We talked constantly about the things we wanted to get for each other. And when we had the means, we would buy that special gift and deliver it in grand fashion!
I really shouldn't worry. I know Heidi. She's amazing. She would never hold something like a forgotten gift against me, not for long at least. She loves what I get her, no matter what it is.
Now that I think about it... It's hard to remember the gifts we've given each other over the years. The things that are most memorable are the thoughts behind it all. I kind of feel like we are the "Gift of the Magi" couple. You know the story were Jim sells his pocket watch to buy hair combs for Della who has just sold her hair to buy a gold chain for Jim's pocket watch.
This year Zechariah woke me up at 6 AM. I put on my running shoes and went nine miles (9th anniversary) to get Heidi flowers and breakfast which included our favorite, pain au chocolat. When I got back, exhausted (because we live at the top of a really steep road), what could Heidi be bringing out of the oven but pain au chocolat. We both appreciate each other so much. We didn't need anything else.

Forth of July Fireworks!

We went to our friends house in Gilroy to see the fireworks. 

The boys snuggled together to stay warm. They really enjoyed each other!

Small town fireworks are great. They were so close. I shot this with a wide angle lens (24 mm). We almost got hit my a misfire.

They boys hide under a blanket when the fireworks were really loud.

They were pretty proud of themselves for not being too scared.

Ryan and Candice took care of Harley for me for the whole time. She really enjoyed them. Heidi stayed at the Drummond's with Zechariah and some friends. 

Untitled

Here's another poem from my notebook...

I've got a plan

     a clever trick

          to get a stone to talk.

We'll gather round

     a pile of rocks

          no one will speak or squawk.

Jesus said

     that this would work

          just before He died.

I can't say

     that I've seen it

          even though I've tried.

What you do 

     is not praise God

          don't give Him what He's due.

Then stones and rocks

     will all cry out

          declaring what is true.

The reason that

     it's never worked

          is that I can't be still.

I see the stones,

     the grass, the trees

          rising up the hills

And there I see

     my Savior, God,

          Creator, Kind, and Friend

Then praises rise

     in my stoney heart.

          His praise is without end.

I've Got a Boy, He's Got a Father

This is a poem I wrote when my first son became a believer. It's fading from the notebook I scratched it in so I thought I better put it somewhere more permanent.

A father's love is deeper than

     one can understand

The Father Himself gave me a son

     designed by His own hand

Before his birth God made it clear

     the child would not be mine

My son is now my brother

     We share a Father divine

The Great Outdoors!

Zechariah Job

    It's been a long time since my last post, and you may be well aware of why we named our son Zechariah Job. If you don't, here's the explanation. Zechariah means "God Remembers," and Job means "the Afflicted." I wanted a name that reflected the character of God, and God has put a burden on my heart for the suffering people in this world.   
     My first two sons were named after people I want them to grow up to be like: friends, relatives, or Bible characters. Zachariah is named for the attributes and actions of God that I long for and cling to. It is my prayer that Zechariah grows up to embody God's love for the poor and afflicted.

Psalm 10

     11 He says to himself, "God has forgotten;
          he covers his face and never sees."

     12 Arise, LORD! Lift up your hand, O God. 

          Do not forget the helpless.

     17 You hear, O LORD, the desire of the afflicted; 

          you encourage them, and you listen to their cry,

     18 defending the fatherless and the oppressed, 

          in order that man, who is of the earth, may terrify no more.

Psalm 98

3 He has remembered his love and his faithfulness to the house of Israel;

   all the ends of the earth have seen the salvation of our God.

Zechariah 8

        2 This is what the LORD Almighty says: "I am very jealous for Zion; I am burning with jealousy for her."

Here's an e-mail that I wrote to a friend concerning the spelling of Zechariah's name. 

     The short answer to your questions is, "Yes."

     I'm not misspelling Petit's name. It says Zachariah on his birth certificate. It took a little persuading for Heidi to go along with that name, and I thought I was giving a little ground by spelling it with an 'a' so that it would easily translate into the not-all-that-uncommon, Zach. Later she said she was surprised that I did that, and I thought, "Yeah, I kind of caved there. The last thing I was trying to do was conform to popular tradition... then at the last minute I did." So spelling it with an 'e' is kind of reclaiming a good name; a name from the living Word of God. It is an allowing of confusion in acknowledgement of fact that often mystery is deeper, truer... than understanding. 

     That's the first time I've really answered the question. So I might cut-and-paste it for other people. 

     Loveya, 

         Jeff Frazee......

Baby Boy

This is our new baby boy. We don't have a name yet.

Dusty Boxes

You might have noticed on some of my other sites that I recently moved our belongings into their third storage place in the past two years. When you're moving things it's always a good opportunity to off-load things and reminisce. I found my old copy of The NIV Harmony of the Gospels, and inside was the card I signed in October of 1996 committing to pray about and seek my role in international missions. I've mentioned the card to many people as we have spoken with different churches, and I talked about it in the video we sent out. So now here it is, for your viewing pleasure, for the first time on the world wide web... my Moody Bible Institute World Evangelism Decision Card!!!

The Thorn

I thought I blogged this before, but I couldn't find it. I love it.

I stood a mendicant of God before His royal throne
And begged Him for a priceless gift, which I could call my own.
I took the gift from out His hand, but as I would depart
I cried, “But Lord, this is a thorn and it has pierced my heart.
This is a strange, a hurtful gift that Thou hast given me.
He said, “My child, I give good gifts and give my best to thee.”
I took it home and though at first the cruel thorn hurt sore;
As long years passed I learned at last to love it more and more.
I learned He never gives a thorn without this added Grace.
He takes the thorn to pin aside the veil which hides His face.

“The Thorn,” by Martha Snell Nicholson

The Road to Mali

Turn up your volume.
I hope this brings some clarity to what is going on in our lives. Please feel free to share this video. Pray that we get all the support we need to leave by August!

Loss and Gain

My mother-in-law (affectionately known as 'belle mere' or Janou) wrote me an e-mail to let me know she is praying for us. She included a quote by David Livingston.

< "I never made a sacrifice." -David Livingston

But I think my belle mere said it better. She was a missionary in Africa for 25 years 'ish.'

"We have encountered, which you and Heidi may have as well, individuals who talk about the sacrifice we make in going to Africa. We have said that no—is not at all true. In fact the sacrifice would have been to have stayed in the U.S. and sacrificed God’s blessing on our family since He had called us to go and we must obey that call. Africa was where He wanted us to be. It was not without its difficulties, the hard times, the sickness, the separations—all like Livingston mentions. But, the blessings far outweigh and overshadow the other things."